See you there!

There are two places you could start.

1. Find a job and let that determine where you move.
2. Pick a place and let that determine where you begin your job search.

Mr. Charismatic and I chose option #2. There were several factors that influenced our decision.

• We saved our pence for a year in preparation for the move and subsequent unknown period of unemployment.
• We don’t have any debt or dependents.
• We bought short term health insurance to cover us in catastrophes. Using ehealthinsurance.com we found decent policies to cover the both of us for $65/month for up to six months.
• We knew if we chose option #1, I would have to travel first and we’d be apart for some unknown amount of time. It also meant that we would be dealing with the Visa process apart and we were really glad to have each other to lean on for the ups and downs that came. By the way, it might be helpful for you marrieds out there to know that you may be able to apply for your British partner’s visa through the London Embassy thus avoiding the long(er) waiting periods you have to face if you apply through the normal US visa agency.
• We also had a lot of support from friends and family in all sorts of ways. We stayed with family to save on rent before we left Britain and we stayed with family again when we arrived in America. Without this, we would have been saving our pence in Britain for a second year before we would have been brave enough to quit our jobs and move.

If option #1 is best for you, I’m afraid my experience is a little lacking here. I suppose it really depends on what kind of job you are looking for. One thing that has changed in the last few years is the importance of networking. I conducted several informational interviews, one of which led to a second one and that led to me hearing about the job that I now have. Many people are using LinkedIn – a social networking site for career minded folks and job seekers. Contact anyone you know in the US and let them know you are looking. And don’t get discouraged by those who want to tell you how bad things are in America. It really varies depending on where you go. In fact, it may be helpful to know which places are thriving or struggling. Here’s a list from the housing market perspective and from the job perspective.

If option #2 is best for you then there are several factors to consider. Take a good look at a map, your lifestyle, airports, weather, cost of living, schools, and narrow down a place or region. For us, our decision came down to experience and family. Mr. Charismatic has already spent plenty of time in the Pacific NW and we bought our plane ticket to my hometown where most of my family still live. When we started our job search with two cities in mind, and we later decided to stay in my hometown because one of us got a job worth staying for.

We’d both recommend you visit any place before you move there. If you can, narrow down a region and then spend a week or two exploring it on holiday before you commit. But remember that your holiday may be very different from your experience when you do eventually live there.

Finally, consider this process a wonderful adventure. You’ll need the same set of coping skills you needed when you moved to Britain – flexibility, open-mindedness, endurance, a sense of humor, and willingness to take some risks… to name a few.

In my own move, I’ve experience a lot of nostalgia for my first few months in Britain. I get to witness Mr. Charismatic’s adventures and frustrations. It all takes me back to mine. So, be prepared for a little of that. It has also changed our relationship in some ways. Be prepared for that too. I’ll post another blog on some of the more emotional aspects of moving soon.

Readers – what other practical advice do you have for heading West?

Lisa B and others, keep us up to date on how it goes!

When researchers presented scenarios that required out of the box problem solving, a majority of those who zeroed in on the best answers had spent some years living in another country. What’s more, a recent study found that former expats were more likely to be promoted. Explains Prof. Galinsky at the Kellogg School of management at Northwestern University “When abroad, you’re forced to adapt to a local culture” and to fit in– you’re exercising your brain by thinking about cultural norms and how to adapt to them.’

For all our readers out there that are still pondering that move to the UK, this is another reason (besides Cadbury’s, good moisture for your skin, Topshop and Glastonbury) to get you coming on over. Now if the UK Home Office would only agree I am sure you would be over in a flash, right?

So, your British man embarrassingly orders his lingerie for you over the internet, didn’t go bonkers for you on Valentine’s Day, and rarely writes you poems or a song… and its not just us 3 Shes not From Yorkshire lasses that have noticed.  The Times just published a little blurb about it last month (19/7/09):

British men are among the least romantic in the world. In a study of 6,500 men and women from across the world, psychologist Richard Weisman found that British men were 10% less likely to make romantic gestures then men from other countries. Only 32% of Brit men have written a song or poem for their loved one, compared with 41% of non-British men, and only 44% had taken their other halves on a surprise holiday compared with 51% elsewhere. The study also found that British men mistakenly  believe that buying sexy lingerie is the key to a woman’s heart, when what really want are little gestures and a cup of tea in bed.

(We say how about lingerie AND a cuppa of tea in bed?!)

Combined , us 3 American ladies have 17.5 years of insight into loving a British bloke. Want to read more about it? Click here

Tell our readers a little bit about yourself:

I think I’ll call myself BigApplePie

How long did you live in England and what brought you to the UK in the first place ?

I lived in North East England for approximately 4 and 1/2 years.  I moved for love and married a ‘Geordie’.  Unfortunately, our marriage did not work out and we were divorced 2 1/2 years after I had arrived in this strange country that I came to love.

What were the reasons you decided to move back to America?

This was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made.  Being a musician, I worked very diligently to create a name and work for myself to support living on my own.  However, I was thousands of miles away from my own family and felt a little lonely.  In the Spring of 2008 I was offered a job that was located near where I grew up in America and I battled over making a decision to move or not.  On one hand I would be working in a similar field, but on the other hand it was back to working 5 days a week.  Saying ‘yes’ would meant that I was going to leave a career that I had built to return to my family and have a wonderful support system and spend holidays with them. Saying ‘no’ meant I would continue my career but would spend birthdays and special holidays away from my family.  Also, during my decision making time, an intruder broke into my cottage and I had to turn to local friends for help.  It made me a little scared to come home late at night when I was all alone.

I truly battled over this decision and with the economic downturn, I decided that if I ever wanted to try and move back to the states that this was the time to try.  Moving with a job, was a better segue than just moving blindly back without the promise of work.

So after 6 months, I said ‘yes’.

How long did the process take to move back ‘home’?

Moving back was very straight forward. I decided to move in August and by October I was living and working in the US.  My personal items arrived a bit later.  I used Pickfords, the most amazing moving company in the UK, their US equivalent is called Allied.  I arranged for sea freight and they packed up everything and started the move one month before I actually left the UK.  I also went through the paperwork of moving with my large breed dog.  This has been made very easy through a programme called PETS.  However, it requires rabies injections and clearances 6 months prior to moving, so be prepared.

Now that you have moved back what do you miss about the UK, if anything?

The grass is always greener.  I never thought that moving back to the USA would feel like moving to a new country, but I was learning things that I had forgotten and it wasn’t as easy as I thought.  I actually hadn’t lived in the US for over 5 years because of my transition. Very quickly after moving, I started regretting leaving the UK.  Even though my parents had been so helpful with arrangements, I just missed the independance I had created in the UK.  The move did end up costing a lot more than expected and with the economy down the tubes, the exchange rate was NO longer in my favour… bummer.

I love that the UK has such wonderful cutoms and traditions.  It alwasy amazed me to arrive at a gig and find that I was performing in one of the oldest castles or an incredible stately home.  The society is very ‘real’ and this reality is very touching.  Meeting new people, whether rich or living on very little, there was an appreciation for life and music too which was a bonus.

Also, the UK’s national health system is amazing and SOOO easy.

What changes do you notice about yourself since you last lived in America?

I am a more polite driver and I am not as ‘fast-paced’ as other people my age.  I realized that I had forgotten a lot of American’isms, because I had changed some of my words and speech to ‘fit in’ in England… now I was being criticized in America, so I am learning how to speak all over again.  No more boot of the car, right-hand drive cars (which I occaisionally get in the car and sit there hoping that no one saw me get in on the wrong side!! LOL), pants/trousers, etc…

Anything you have noticed now that you didn’t notice before about America/Americans?

I see that the states is extrememly competitive in work and life.  There are fewer holidays and people are very ‘work-driven’.  It is almost sad.  Also, there seems to be this horrible threat of being ‘sued’.  I don’t understand this at all.

The other thing is that I find Americans are very wasteful.  With the focus on becoming ‘green’ a few more Americans are starting to conserve but as a nation it is very disheartening to see the waste going on.

Any advice to other Americans in the UK that are thinking about moving back home?

Be sure of what you really want in tens years from now… make a choice based on your life, not your surroundings.  There are things that I miss about both sides of the pond and I am still unsure about my choice but everyone is different.  But make sure you visit ‘back home’ before you take the plunge… things might have changed and your views might have changed too.

Any chance you will return?

This is something I am still seriously considering.  Stay tuned…

What have you noticed about American men in comparison to the UK guys (I asked this because  we get asked that a lot)

I am probably the worst person to answer this… but generally there are good, respectful men and the opposite in both countries.  Always remember to look at their family values… how did they grow up and how do they treat their mothers!!

Thanks so much!

(Thinking of making the move back to America? You might also like this post)

Hey lovelies, today we are proud to bring you a guest post by a new blogger, Redlilocks– (insert applause!)

A quick introduction… I grew up in Pennsylvania but moved to Denver and then later to Wisconsin where I met an English man with a wicked sense of humour who made me laugh like no American man ever did. After a whirlwind romance, we married and I moved to Kent with him in 2001. Cut a long story short, the relationship didn’t work out & we divorced two years later. By that point, however, I felt so happy and settled in the UK that I decided to stay. I lived in Kent for 8 years and have only just recently moved to Manchester (oop north) to live with my new lovely man. This is not to gloss over the first 3 months I was here in which I spent either crying, saying, ‘pardon?’ to every person who attempted conversation or dreaming of Wendy. (No, not my BFF – the burger joint). But I stopped making comparisons and started to enjoy what the UK had to offer – and there was plenty. Including good friends.
Reading the comments, I felt compelled to write as it seems so many have such a problem making friends with British women. I have some fantastic friends here and genuinely love the UK. I relate so much better to the British mentality then the American ‘gung-ho’ attitude which always left me feeling slightly uncomfortable. That is not to say I’m reserved – by no stretch of the imagination – I’m actually very enthusiastic and out-going but I think I’ve learned that British people aren’t actually cold and snotty but they ARE more reserved and I have had to adapt the way I approach making friends with this in mind.
I have a lot of really great female friends here but have admittedly ‘worked’ for it – at least to start – but it’s been totally worth it and I’d like to share my advice. Bear in mind there are no guarantees here. After all, some people are just not very nice and nothing you can do will change that but do you really want to be friends with someone like that? No, I didn’t think so.
Let’s get started then.

MEETING FOR THE 1ST TIME:
Turn down the volume. I have turned my ‘volume’ of enthusiasm when meeting new people from about a 9 down to around a 5. This isn’t about not being yourself, it’s about being a more chilled out version of yourself .
Asking lots of personal questions doesn’t work. Whatever you do, DON’T ask a million and one questions when you first meet someone thinking that will break the ice. It won’t. They will think you are being exceptionally nosey – questions can come upon meeting them the 2nd, 3rd and 4th time. It’s like melting ice – yeah you can go at it with a sledgehammer to break it into a million pieces or you can warm up the temperature around it and wait. Believe me, the waiting is worth it.
Engage in pointless chitchat. Go ahead and talk about the weather for the first conversation. Tell them where you are from, why you’re here when they inevitably ask and you may need to smile and laugh while you suffer through their stories of holidays in Florida. If the conversation falls flat, let it. English people are not as uncomfortable with silence as Americans. It’s okay, you haven’t failed. Compliments are always welcome. Tell them you love their earrings or their shoes or their bag – it might start a conversation about how great Matalan is.
Keep it light, Keep it positive. DON’T complain about anything British (not even the weather). They will get defensive which is what you are trying to avoid. DO NOT TALK RELIGION OR MONEY. Keep it light and impersonal.

MEETING FOR THE 2ND TIME:
Be warm, not overbearing. You will find they will be a little warmer. Smile warmly back. That is all. Don’t extend your hand (You are not on an interview.)
Remember their name. This is sort of a no-brainer. Don’t be upset if they’ve forgotten yours. I can guarantee they haven’t forgotten you – being American brings with it a novelty value.
Be personable without being intrusive. Now is the time to be slightly more personal. Ask them where they are from, what they do.
Know your limits. Now is probably not the best time to regale them with stories of your childhood or how much money you make. There’s time for all that (well, not the money – that’s just not a conversation you want to have. Ever.)
Bear with the process. It seems long-winded. You’ll have to bite your tongue. You will feel like you are not getting anywhere but I promise you will!

MEETING FOR THE 3RD & 4th TIME:
Greet them appropriately. You may find by this time that they will be even warmer – you might want to give a kiss on the cheek if you feel it is welcome (NOT A HUG). If not, a warm smile always works.
Get to know them ‘properly’: Now you can start asking more personal questions, asking their opinion about something in the news, offer funny stories (preferably if you’ve done something silly – they love self-deprecating humour and it shows humility). Don’t be surprised if they start asking you some personal questions back and genuinely try to get to know you.
Don’t be scared. If you find you have things in common and you would like to see them again, invite them around for a cup of tea or a drink down the pub. You’ll be surprised how quickly the English will open up when they’ve had a few.
I think the main thing is not to try too hard – it will seem forced. My female friends (English) who have met other Americans find them scary – overly enthusiastic (which they don’t trust; they think it is fake, no matter how sincere you are) and nosey. What’s natural and normal for us is alien to them and they don’t know how to take it. So being accepted here is all about working around THEIR issues slowly until they are warm enough to you that you can feel very natural about totally being yourself. By that time, they will have (almost) forgotten you are American and the person beyond that will shine through.
You might not want to take my advice – it’s just what’s worked for me. I find with English people, once they DO warm up to you, you will have some pretty fantastic relationships. When I moved from Kent to Manchester, I had 3 going away parties because I had 3 different groups of pals (male/female mixed) that I wanted to be able to say goodbye to. It’s worked and I don’t feel like I’ve not been myself, or have denied who I am.
So now that I have moved I’m starting all over again – having to make new friends. I start a new job tomorrow and am hoping that in a couple months time, I have made some new friends to go shopping with or get lunch with or have a natter with over tea. In the meantime, I’ll smile politely, chat about the weather and laugh at the appropriate places when they tell me all about their annual trip to Disneyworld.

• Best music scene in the world, everything from Nick Drake to George Michael to the Smiths to Florence and the Machine
• A ‘quality newspaper’ for every kind of person. From the titty gals in The Sun to The Guardian, your beliefs are catered for–you can feel righteous and validated whateveh your stance.
• A cuppa Betty’s Tea, the best in Yohhhkshire
• The hilarious and un-PC road sign that means that ‘pensioners are crossing‘
• Getting a pound note (!) for change and keeping it for good luck in my billfold
• Eating a Mumtaz  Curry amongst the Muslim Clerics in Bradford (and not having to wear a headscarf to have the honour)
• Strolling Costco in Leeds, a PMS haven when needed to supply Oprah magazine and 24-count donut packs
• Free NHS contraception, it just makes lovin’ so much easier on the wallet, thank you very much.
• Getting the chance to live in a rambling, creaky multi-level 1890′s Victorian terrace house (that may be haunted)
• William Constable Turner’s ‘Rain, Steam and Speed’ at the National Gallery in London
• Those cheery and optimistic weather forecasters that must have the worst weather forecasts to impart in all of Europe. Maybe the world! (heh heh)
• The two expressions “That’s as much use as a chocolate teapot!” and “He couldn’t organise a piss-up in a brewery!”
• Watching ‘A Place in the Sun’ on Channel 4, 8pm Friday with Mr. Chill as we dream about where the hell to live

Like to be inspired more by Britain’s positives? Click here.

Want 13 Reasons to Love America? Click here

How do you explain an important American institution  like the Cheesecake Factory to someone who is not American? Its a toughie! I would start by mentioning the 146 locations dotted across the country (ok so I looked that one up), and that the restaurants are mostly located in/near shopping malls (to draw in those hungry consumers, I suppose.)

I would then go on to describe the decor. Oh, its supposed to look like really classy and fancy, like something those sophisticated “Europeans” would design. I am talking swirly- pink -marble -galore and Doric columns in abundance. I then explain that this place does food too, not just desserts (well, like cheesecake but its NOT a factory!). But some people go and have only cheesecake for their dinner. (That’s America for you! I explain, the freedom to have dessert for your main course).

You’d better be hungry because the portions are as big as your face bigger than your head. In fact, its usually so crowded with customers that you get a little buzzer when your table is ready as there is usually a huge queue for tables. I would end by explaining that unlike in the UK doggy bags are the norm. Sigh. Doggie bags full of cheesecake….

1. Cheeky digs at the groom about settling down, no more single life, gaining in-laws etc with a really loving undertone because he really is so happy for his friend.

2. Charm and flattering anecdotes for you, the bride, because he wants you to know that the cheeky digs are just a right of passage for the groom and not something to take too seriously. 

3. The comfort of knowing that your groom is getting a bachelor party that will exceed all of his expectations and never leave him feeling like he didn’t get a proper send off – but that his British best man has the taste and discretion to keep it classy.

4. When you make your entrance and begin to walk down the aisle – if your groom starts to get a little emotional – the British best man won’t be afraid to put his arm around his friend, give him a knowing look and help him keep it together.

5. Your American wedding guests will find the best man (and the other British groomsmen for that matter) so charming and you will be eternally grateful to him for helping your guests be comfortable and entertained while you and your groom do your best to connect with everybody there.

6. When it is time for the toasts, the British best man will appear just nervous enough but be prepared with a thoughtful, hilarious, and tastefully appropriate speech.  He will manage to take the mick just enough so that everyone finds the groom even more charming and interesting than ever before. 

7. And after the wedding is over, the best man will still be the same great friend he was before you got married even though he might be just a little freaked out that his best friend got married. 

Ladies – just think you should know what your getting if you decide YOUR British man is the one for you. 

I brought my lovely British husband to Non-Profit Networking night as part of our job search.  Immediately, I got stuck talking to an angry lady who wanted to discuss the health care system in America.  Meanwhile Mr. Charismatic was talking to someone else and I was convinced he’d found a dynamic and interesting career professional with great connections.  Turns out, no – this woman is  pet pyschic trying to promote her business.  Pet psychic… really? 

Back in Britain, I remember being asked about the perception that Americans are crazy for their pets.  Me?  Not so much.  But a typical card shop does tend to carry gretting cards from the dog, for the dog, for the loss of a pet etc… so perhaps we are a little.  What do you think?

That reminds me – in a  great little place called Friday Harbor located in the San Juan Islands there is a doggy daycare that actually takes dogs on field trips using their Downtown Dog bus.  It is pretty cute to see the bus driving around town with all the doggies in the windows.  Click on the link to see what I mean.

A little bit of background:

1) Mr. Charismatic and I moved back to my home city in America about a month before our wedding.

2) I wear SPF 15 or better every day and was so sad when all the Friends stars started appearing super tan circa 1997 because I knew a crazy perma-tan culture was about to take hold and I would be thrust into a vanity vs. sensability battle over my skin. 

3) My tanning experience is limited to about 4 sessions right before my junior prom in 1998, maybe 2 sessions in college, and two weeks of regular tanning during my second year in Yorkshire which I justified with the typical British tanning excuse: I’m going on holiday and I don’t want to burn on the first day. 

So, Mr. Charismatic and I planned to do about 3-4 tanning sessions each before our wedding just to have a light tan color and I promised myself that this would be my last ever time in a tanning bed.  Well, let me tell you – I will keep that promise to myself for sure because in the 4 years I was in Britain, the cost of tanning in America spiraled into total insanity!

Did you know that there are crazy new systems of tanning that somehow use high pressure bulbs to increase the ratio of UVA to UVB rays?  This is how the ridiculous sales person explained it to us: “When it comes to tanning, what is more important to you – safety or cost?  Safety you say?  Then all you need to know is that the B in UVB stands for Bad.  So, the higher the concentration of UVA’s the better the tan and I promise you won’t burn at all.  It starts at $49 per session.”

So what did we do?  Ignored our instincts to run away and went for the cheaper option (which was still like $13 a session) AND completely got burnt even though we only tanned for 8 minutes.  Do you remember when tanning was about $5 and all you had to do was go use the one normal bed at the local gym?  Apparently, this is not how it works anymore. 

Me and tanning?  No longer friends – and my skin thanks me for that.

In the United Kingdom and some other Commonwealth realms, elevenses is a snack that is similar to afternoon tea, but eaten in the morning.  It is generally less savoury than brunch, and might consist of some cake or biscuits with a cup of tea. The name refers to the time of day that it is taken: around 11 am.

According to me:

Freakin’ awesome!

Seriously, people  - how did we cope in America without Elevenses!?!  Ok, ok, I can hear you speaking to me through the blogosphere – We do have elevenses in America.  But we don’t call it elevenses and it’s just not the same.

In the States I seem to remember doughnuts, Starbucks or Entenmann’s being involved, and coffee… always coffee.  There’s a lot of good things on that list.  Good, tasty, artery-clogging things.

But there’s something gorgeous about a cup of tea and one single biscuit (ok, 2… cheeky).  And if you manage to wangle the jammy dodger out of the biscuit selection then SCORE, baby!!!

Points to England for inventing the most descriptive word for the occassion.  Half a point lost for not having a grocery store that sells Entenmann’s near my house right now, though…

• Bath and Body Works (Jo Malone, the Body Shop, and Boots are just not the same).
• Butter Rum Life Savers.
• Wet and Wild cosmetics (always thought that name was a bit dodgy, even at age12!).
• Crazy fitness trends like ‘Singles Yoga’ classes and ‘The Shred’ that you can sample.
• Unashamed self-help shows like Oprah and Dr. Phil.
• Ordering huge healthy salads at restaurants that are meant to be the main course to offset the next item
• Girl Scout cookies, especially those Samoas. Thin Mints!
• Men in baseball caps. I never thought I would write that one!
• Drive-thru everything (prescriptions, donuts, Starbucks, dry cleaning, banking, wedding chapels…)
• Beyonce and her bootylicious dancing, and Sasha Fierce persona.
• American top 40 (shame about Casey Kasem retiring though).
• American feminism including publications like  Bust, Ms. and Bitch.
• Tar-jay designer gear at normal human being prices.

What is the best thing about living/moving to England?

A lot of things come to mind with this one, but I think the #1 corker has got to be how walkable everything is.  Driving or public transport is still important, but walking is a built in part of the culture and I LOVE it.

Oh, and free health care is freakin’ cool…

What is the worst?

Distance from family – hands down.  This is an obvious one, but being far away from family is pretty tough sometimes.  The thing about homesickness is that I never get any warning – it doesn’t creep in slowly so I can ready myself.  It’s more like getting hit by a car (not that I’d know exactly).  One minute you’re fine, on your way to Tesco, then BAM! HOMESICK… ugh.

What was the hardest thing about moving?

Emotionally – the goodbyes.  A seemingly endless list of goodbyes – and BIG goodbyes, y’know?  For me they started about 3-months before I moved and just kept coming… and then my dog died the DAY BEFORE I moved.  Worst… worst ever.  But I did it and it didn’t kill me, so I guess it made me stronger – that’s how it’s supposed to work, right?

Physically – carrying my life in suitcases through airports, train stations and car journeys with arms built like tooth picks.

Besides family, what do you miss most about America?

I could be weak and predictable and say Chipotle, but I think we all know that the most ‘miss-able’ thing is American Enthusiasm.  I capitalise this to emphasise its importance

Americans have the wonderful and precious gift of enthusiasm – it’s built in – right off the shelf.  It’s not like everyone in the States is chirpy and happy and smiley and ‘can do’, but they’ve got a clear advantage.  It something that permeates the whole of the country in a way that’s just not present here.  I miss it SO MUCH… I wish I could order it online…

How long was it before you started using the word “home” again?

Somewhere between years 3 and 4 – but I still call America home, too.

What is the least pleasant difference between England and the U.S.?

Hmmm… I’m not sure.  It would probably have to be something related to my difficulty making english-women-friends.  I just can’t seem to get English women to warm to me (for the most part), hence the blog about being treated like an alien from outer space.

The most pleasant difference?

Man, so many things come to mind.  You’re so close to Europe, English men are awesome (well, mine is anyway! ), the humour is second-to-none…

If you were to Google British culture, how many of the results would you say are true/realistic?

I don’t know about Google, but if you want a good idea of what you’re in for, read ‘Watching the English’ by Kate Fox.  I’ve read quite a few books about being in England or visiting England, but this one really explained a lot.  And it’s funny, too… I especially found the chapter on the English art of The Understatement incredibly enlightening.

What are some of your reasons for moving to England?

Just the one – my English dude…

On a scale of 1-10, how happy would you say you are in England?

I’d say 9.0 – I’d move it up to 10.0 if I could realise my dream of living in the US for 3 months out of every year…

Is living in England what you thought it would be?

I wrote a journal entry about what I thought living in England would be like before I’d actually moved here.  I can honestly say that I didn’t have a SINGLE CLUE what I was in for.  But that doesn’t mean I’m not enjoying what I’ve found

Do you plan on moving back to the U.S.?

100% yes and 100% no.  I would love to live half-and-half, but I know that I’ve somewhat sealed my fate.  If I moved back to the States I would miss England so much, and vice versa…

Me and my Mom can’t even talk about the idea without bawling because I think we both hate the idea of never living in the same country again.  Visiting will never be the same and that’s just something you have to live with.

And finally, would you say England is worth all the drama and pain and tears that it takes to get there?

Yup.  Absolutely.  I wouldn’t take back a single day – if someone hit rewind, I’d just do it all again.

Thanks for getting in touch, Taylor!  Keep us posted about your possible move!

But right after I found this site, it occurred to me that I don’t really want to buy any of this stuff when I’m in the UK.  I think what I actually MISS about these American beauties is being able to go out and buy/see them – and for it to be normal.  Does that make any sense?

It not like I want to buy a bag of Nestle Toll House Morsels and make the biggest be-all-end-all-giant-batch of chocolate chip cookies ever.  What I MISS is being able to mention Nestle Toll House Morsels and have everyone know what I’m talking about, or to go shopping and see them at the grocery store, or to go to my Grandma’s house and see them in the pantry.

I guess, if I put the shoe on the British foot for a minute, the same goes for English stuff in America.  I don’t really want to go back to the States and drink squash, or eat Marmite, or have baked beans for breakfast.  Although I would do all those things, I certainly wouldn’t object – I just wouldn’t go out of my way.

Although, having said all that, I can feel my first American Soda order brewing beneath the surface – even if it’s just for the ranch dressing…

Nobody blogged about the 4th…

Weird.

We must be getting pretty English…

This year I generally conquered home-sickness because it was one of my sis-in-laws birthday and my other sis-in-law’s engagement party on the 4th.  Nothing like distraction to keep the homesickness wolf at bay!

But there are standard things that I try to make-happen every 4th of July that I spend in the UK:

1. Get everyone in the room to stand up while I sing the American national anthem
2. Get people I know to walk up and down the street in a line while I stand on the sidewalk, watch and clap.
3. Get people I know to wear bright red coats while I hide behind a rock and take pot-shots at ‘em.

So far I’ve had a pretty bad success rate… the only thing I’ve managed is to make Mr. Nice Guy listen to me sing the national anthem and that’s only because we were driving to the store so he couldn’t get away

One thing that has happened 3 out of the 4 years is that we’ve had pizza (usually Pizza Hut) and watched an American movie… not too shabby.

How did you guys spend the 4th this year?

You go for a drive – you’re constantly on the look out to make sure they don’t dive in front of you.

You go and hang out in the part – you feel like a lazy dude because there’s joggers swarming all around you.

I have nothing against joggers whatsoever, in fact I used to be one.  I’m kind of an exercise-ho… I jump on whatever exercise band wagon is barreling along and see what it’s like.  I’ll try pretty much anything that I can do on my own – Pilates, yoga, tap-dancing, roller-skating, circuit training, gym memberships, Curves, and right now I’m doing the 30 Day Shred (and, bloody hell, it’s whooping me BIG TIME.)

But I’ve never seen such a huge presence of joggers anywhere else ever.  No matter what time it is, no matter what the weather is like, they’re out there – running along in their extra-aero-dynamic-skin-tight suits and reflective shoes.

I’ve done my fair share of moving, I’ve lived all over – US, UK, big cities, tiny towns, north, south, and east (but not west).  But I’ve never seen anything quite like it before.  It’s funny because Mr. Nice Guy says that when he thinks of Americans, he thinks of extremes.  People are EXTREMELY Christian, or EXTREMELY liberal, or EXTREMELY healthy, or EXTREMELY fat.  But we seem to live in a health-nut area in the South West of England… it does make it seem kind of American somehow.

Is this one of those North South divide things?  Has anyone else noticed?

Anyway, I keep seeing all these joggers and thinking ‘Oooo, I should go for a run, that looks good’.  The actually ACT of jogging has yet to take place, but I’m not holding my breath.  I don’t have anything left after The Shred, anyway

In your opinion what unique things happen in Britain during Wimbledon?

It always feels to me the start of summer when Wimbledon comes on. You will hear words like “Hawk eye”. You will see tennis rackets begin thrown. Young ball boys barely over the age of 10 will be hit by balls traveling over 120 miles an hour. At least 2 people will pass out live on television with heat exhaustion. Cliff Richard, a 60 year old pop star from the 1960′s, will be invited to the semi final and the final. And if it rains at Wimbledon and the game has to stop, Cliff is handed the microphone and he sings to the crowd. Pimm’s comes out, as does strawberries and cream.  My tennis coaching school business booms.

What are your views on the great British hopeful Andy Murray?

This year will be extra exciting because the UK has a genuine championship hopeful. The last time Britain was this excited about Wimbledon was in the heyday of Tim Henman. Outside of the main area where all the posh people sit is a big hill in Wimbledon. If you can’t afford a ticket you can watch it on the big screen there. This was called “Henman Hill” when he was around. Now its called “Murray Mount”. So you will see over the next 2 weeks Britain work itself up into a wild world-cup style frenzy as Andy Murray progresses in the rounds.  Hope that answers your questions if not will see you and Mr. Chill tonight down at the pub later!

–E

P. S. Forget to mention for your blog readers that the biggest thing you will see is that suddenly all the deserted tennis courts across the UK suddenly fill up with people wanting to be Andy Murray against their friends. For these 2 weeks England stops begin a football crazy place and become s a tennis crazy one.Today as I was driving, even the chavs were rampaging their friends with tennis fever. I love it.

Anyways, I did grow to appreciate offering tea/coffee to any guests or visitors to my home.  And I loved when visiting others I was sure to get a cup of tea to warm me up.  In fact, I learned that the warming tea was a great way to feel more comfortable because I used to leave my coat on when visiting others because I am pretty much always cold and British people thought it strange indeed.  What can I say, I never learned that people want you to remove your outer layer upon entering their home.  Whatever, thank goodness for hot tea. 

So I was sitting at a relative’s house in my American home city and was there for over an hour and never once was offered a drink.  It was so strange.  The seven other American women didn’t seem to mind.  None of them were fidgeting because they had nothing in their hands.  But I was sitting there preoccupied that my relative must have run out of coffee because I couldn’t even smell any brewing in the kitchen.  Not that I wanted coffee, I wanted tea.  But it wouldn’t have been the same anyways. 

Mr. Charismatic’s family arrive tomorrow for our wedding.  I bought them an electric kettle to use for the 2 weeks they are around and  plan to go round to theirs and drink tea with them often.  This will be one of the pleasures I look forward to when we come back to visit Britain.  Maybe it will be my British “Chipotle”.  mmmm

ps. I haven’t yet been to Chipotle and I’ve been here almost 4 weeks!  Its funny that when there is no sense of urgency to satisfy my American food cravings, I don’t even bother.   Perhaps if I wasn’t a little worried about fitting into my wedding dress perfectly I would have had a big yummy burrito by now.

Living in the UK and approaching 30 has done it to me. I am just another American expat who is outta the loop with what’s hip and cool in America. In this country, I debate Cath Kidston over Boden, Jamie Oliver over Gordon, or Netto to Tesco’s… and I am slowly leaving behind my knowledge of current American culture.  I am loving the new culture… but I have recently heard these current USA phrases and they left me mystified and reaching for Google:

• Fourth meal– The meal between dinner and breakfast, coined by Taco Bell.
• Emo Kid– a teenage kid with hair over their eyes that wears skinny jeans, and skinny black ties. It sounds more complicated then that though judging by the amount online written by teens trying to define it!
• Cougar– Thanks to Expat mum for this  new word,  which was shouted at her recently. With “Cougar” goes “Cougar Hunting” as well.  I guarantee a pissed off man invented this terminology.
• Just Push the Easy Button-- someone told me that Office Max coined that one on television ads. I can’t confirm that one though.

How about you, lovely readers, any words you weren’t in the know about either?? Do dish.